Birthday cake!

Katelynn's request for her bday cake was one I had attempted a couple of years ago for her and it didn't work out so well. It tasted good but didn't look so good. 

It's an ICE CREAM CAKE. 

I saw the idea for it on "Sandra Lee's semi homemade" show. I think this year it turned out as good as I could do! It looked good and tasted even better. Enjoy!!!

I know I did!!!

It's a GIRL!

So, my first baby was a week late. I tried to induce labor with a castor oil/orange juice shake. Gross, but a little effective.  Anyway, my mom was coming on Monday and it was saturday. I went in Sunday and spent the next 36 hours on demeral. (This little county hospital didn't DO epidurals...)  I think the smile on my face in the previous post was from the drugs. I don't remember much of the time, except that my blood pressure was high so they kept me in bed, on my left side. I couldn't get up and walk around. I remember going to the bathroom and sitting for a long time. The nurse was a little concerned but I said I was fine. My husband tells me I kept yelling at him to turn the TV down because it was tooo loud. He says it was on mute! I remember him leaving around 4 or so in the morning to go get something to eat. Poor guy. He was a trooper, as was I. 

Time comes to push and I did so for about 2 hours until they decided to take her c-section. I was a bit unprepared for that. That was the part the teacher skipped over in our Lamaze class! My mom had 7 babies the V-way. Why couldn't I? They wheeled me into the OR around 4pm. They wouldn't put me to sleep until they got the catheter in. I had to PEE so bad that I was cramped up. I think they were worried but they didn't let on. I remember praying out loud. The sweet nurse stayed with Mark. I think he was pretty freaked out. We didn't have anyone close at the time. My mom was on her way, through the air, with a million lay overs. She called every time she landed (we were in Michigan, she was coming from CA)

When I woke up I had a baby girl. 8# 8oz. 21in long. Lots of black hair. I didn't get to see her for awhile and Mark had left to go get my mom. I got her around 7pm or so. It had been a long day. I just remember feeling that everything was right in the world and that my life was only going to get better. All I ever wanted to be was a mom, and there I was. A mom. 

Katelynn has a special place in my heart (they all do, but this is her post). She made me a mother. She is the beginning of my motherhood. She is my learning tool. As much as we have bumped heads, I hope she knows how much I love her and how grateful I am to her for being willing to be the FIRST. It's a hard roll to have, but I know she stepped up to the plate in heaven and said she'd be first. I am grateful for her example of faith and truth. I can't wait for her to experience holding her first newborn baby in her arms. There is no other feeling in the world. And there are no words to describe it either. 

I love you Katelynn. Thanks for making me a mom!

(more pictures to come. I'm running late for work!)

14 years ago.....

This was me. A young 21 yr old, ready for the ride of my life. I'll let you know who I got when labor is over....

Does any one know how to get ball point pen ink out of..

A DRYER???????

Apparently I have to check pockets, still.  And I won't tell you who's I should check but I will say that He is old enough to know better :) (love you honey)

So the Magic Eraser didn't work, bleach didn't work, windex didn't work, wd40 didn't work. Any suggestions??? PLEASE!!!!!

(fortunately it was with a small load of darks, only a few things are ruined. But I have a load of whites in the wash waiting for the dryer and I'm thinking it might wreck the whites)

What did you have for breakfast?

So, Sunday, Katelynn made a cake. Well, the cake part, anyway. We didn't have time to frost it for dessert. So Monday after work, Emma and I frosted it. Then Emma decorated it.

 After school we ate it. (and after dinner) 

For breakfast I had this~  (and some milk:) It was DELICIOUS!

(thank goodness for no patients this morning. Now I'm off on a little field trip with Emma and her preschool. I'll post about that later..)

How many of YOU?

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 0 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

I AM AN ORIGINAL!!!!

Thanks Heidi for sharing!

Take me out to the Ball Game....

That's what my husband did. I know, we get enough baseball all week long, but his coworker gave him 2 tickets to the Giants game and he asked me on a date. I said yes, because I can stand to be around him, now! (and everyone else. even my mom! thanks to the meds) 

(not sure what I was looking at. NIce chins, huh?)

So we got there at the top of the 5th inning. The latest my husband has ever gotten to a game! But he was ok with it (child had practice and so on and so forth). We had a nice time just being together. It wasn't to crowded and we had a nice time just being together and taking. WITH NO KIDS TO INTERUPT US!  Just thousands of people. But It felt as if we were all alone. 

        (pretty good seats. this is without my zoom)

We decided to try and park at the closest parking lot - $30. Never again! But we didn't pay for the tickets and we only had $7 nachos, so not a bad date. 

(I totally dug this guys socks. They were kinda cute)

Funniest thing that happened to us was, we were walking over a little bridge to get to the ball park, where there were lots of street people:). A lady is walking very fast towards us and YELLS at my husband that she "HATES @%^$#%&# MICHIGAN AND HE SHOULD GO BACK THERE". Then she says "I #$^@&%^ HATE NIKE, TOO". You see he was wearing a Michigan sweatshirt made by Nike. Then she yelled at the guy behind us to go back to Seattle! We had a good laugh!

I'd still rather watch my kids play any day! Which was today :)

Rebecca pitching - struck a girl out!!!

Katelynn catching. I couldn't do it!!!

Emma being the cutest catcher ever. She totally digs it back there. Her coach is hoping to see her make a play at home! Maybe, but she's even better at 2nd or short!

Andrew, I'll get you next time. I couldn't be in all places at once, even though I did a pretty good job today!

The way it was... and ain't never gonna be!

Maybe this is where I'm all wrong. I think I'll add it to my things to do better!

• Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.
• Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
• Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
• Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.
• During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
• Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
• Be happy to see him.
• Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
• Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
• Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
• Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.
• Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie him down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
• Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
• Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
• A good wife always knows her place.

Ok, so I think it's good to be nice to your husband and have dinner planned, maybe prepared, but I think we should question him id he stays out all night. Maybe it's just me...

HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN......

almost! Celia mentioned using anti-depressants. I had post partum after my babies - not severe but enough to need meds. My mom asked if there was "anyway I could get my hands on some meds?" Well, we don't have health insurance, so I can't afford to go to the Dr. I was able to "get my hands on some" (thanks Andrea :) Soooo..... I should be feeling better soon! Thanks goodness. I don't know if my family could handle it much longer.

Another thing that helped me feel better was a wedding with my mom. We just got back and I'm exhasted but I feel p from the flowers and colors and the feeling from a wedding. It's fun to be "behind the scenes". Here's a few pics from the "candy wedding".

WOW!

Thank you all for your words of encouragement. I know I am not alone and I am so greatful for wonderful friends. I wish I could go t "Blogapalooza" with you all, but I can't. Many reasons, but I wish I could be there to hug each and everyone of you. I feel like my load is lighter already. 

I want to give a special thanks to my long lost best friend from childhood. I found her blog through her parents blog who are serving a mission in the Congo. Anyway, if you ever wanted to know how cute I was as a little girl, check out her blog. Amy's all the way on the east coast, but I'm hoping one day, soon, we can meet up again! Thanks Amy, I'm glad we're together again! Love you!

My dark storm cloud

I mentioned before about being depressed. I still am. I have felt a dark cloud over me. As I searched for a picture this morning of a dark, stormy, yucky, ugly looking rain cloud, (cause that's how I feel), I couldn't find one. Every single one I saw had beauty in it. I had an moment of clarity. Every hard, scary, sad, bad, whatever, time I'm facing or are in, it has it's purpose. I am not looking for the beauty in it. All I see is the dark, turbulent time. I just need help seeing it. Everyone around me is trying to help me see it but I don't want to. Or I am afraid to see it. I am fearful of what might be when the clouds are lifted. Inside me I know, I know my Father in Heaven loves me and has so many blessing waiting for me. I just have to ask. I know He will get me through this. He always has. I just have to rely on Him. 

I am going to write my fears, inadequacies, and worries here and now and move on. But I think, for me, I have to put them down, on "paper". 

I doubt myself as a mother. I don't do the things I want to do or think I should with my kids. I lose it with them more than I keep it. I want to provide them with every opportunity they need and want. I want to teach them more about the gospel and have them love and rely upon it as I do. I want the financial security that it will take to provide for our children (if you only knew how bad it really is). We need / have to move. I don't want my children to hate me for taking them away from their friends and everything they know. I want to provide a better life for them. 

I want to be more organized. I have stacks of things everywhere. I don't know where anything is. My house is a mess. I am a mess. I am out of shape - FAT really - I eat so badly! I am not setting a very good example for my children, especially my girls, of how to be a strong vibrant woman. I have put too much on my plate. 

I am not practicing my faith and relying on it. I do have faith. It can be very scary to use it though. Why is that? 

I am moving forward. I need to see where I am at. As I look back at the things I have written, I can see that things aren't so bad. If I change the word want to have, I can change my life. I know the sun is coming out from behind the clouds. I'm going to post about the wonderful blessings I have in my life a little later. No need to comment, I just needed to get this out of my head, but I love to hear other's experiences and what worked for you. 

Gotcha!

I never play these games but thought I'd give it a whirl. I must admit there are times when I feel like I can't and I don't want to blog anymore. But, like Paige said, I'd need a support group to end it. It's nice to know I'd be missed, though :)

I quit

Ok, enough already. I just can't keep up with blogging. I guess my family will have to figure out what they did day to day on their own. I just can't do it any more. I don't even have time to keep up with all of your blogs. So, tearfully I bid you goodbye. :..(

Ready for school

This was the view I had this morning. My son was in the middle but lept up into action when I pulled out the camera. This is the second day back to school. I feel the same. I'm still in my jammies and I should be getting ready for work. Better run!